A brief ARVO message from Mindy
FROM THE VAULT: October 5, 2012
AYE! OH! AYE! OH! Alright alright alright, FutureBrand. Listen up!
OK, so the bald man, BALDIE up there is busy today. So me Mindy alright I'm writing your ARVO email this week. And I promise to keep it SHORT and to the POINT.
First ok, I need to write Jim a 75,000 word email. Clack clack clack clack clack. Ok, done!
Alright, what was I saying? Oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah ARVO.
Oh wait, there's Jim! JIM! JIM!! JIM!!! OH Big Man!!!!!!! Did you read my email!? Did you read it? READ IT! Where are you going? Don't you soft shoe away from me! Alright alright read it and then come to my office and we'll talk about. I'm sending you a meeting request now so we can talk about it tomorrow, too.
Ok alright sorry, the ARVO email right right right right right.
Oh look there goes Holmfridur. YO TALL GLASS OF WATER! She's so freaking tall. Look at how tall she is. I wish I was that tall.
Now I'm hungry. I want a rice cake and some bird seed. Rest of you might eat that fried shit but not me alright.
Oh there's Malozzi! OH PAESAN! Pizza Boy! Johnny Ravioli! Wanna granola bar with your pepperoni and your gabagool!?!?
Oh shit right right right right I'm sorry the ARVO email.
Oh there's Marcus. MARCUS!!!! I like you shoes. They're fancy. Where'd you get those fancy shoes???? They look expensive!!!! You know where I got my shoes??? Marshalls that's where. You know why. You wanna know why???? Because I don't spend my money on anything alright. It all goes in the mattress. I don't buy shoes and I don't buy furniture. All I have is a couch and no coffee table. I'm saving up all my pennies so I can move to Italy and pick grapes alright. The rest of you will be over here with your fancy shoes and your fried food and I'll be in Italy picking grapes.
What was I doing???? Oh right ARVO!!!!
There's Mark! MARK!!! MARK!!! MARK!!!!!! YO JIBRONI! Listen, I need you to go on a pitch with me. WHEN???? Oh it's this afternoon. Is that enough time to put together 300 slides!?!?!?! Don't worry it's a company with an acronym for a name. Your favorite!!!!
[Daniel walks into Mindy's office, arms waving above his head]:
“Das is unerwünscht! I can't hear myself think in my dimly lit office. It's louder than a Kraftwerk concert out here!!!!”
SORRY! I'm sorry! Alright alright I'll try to keep it down. But I'm ITALIAN!! We're LOUD! And we like to TALK!
Oy vey, there's Lloyd. Hiii-iiii Loyyyyydddddd. No I don't have time to listen to you whine right now. I'm really BUSY right writing this ARVO email alright.
Alright listen, I'm really busy and I'm going to be here all night working. Midnight tonight. Midnight tomorrow. And all next week. But that's what I do alright. I'm a scrapper. I'm scrappy. So the rest of you ok go to Shades of Green tonight, 6 pm sharp. It's on 15th between Irving and 3rd and the walk over there alright is probably the only exercise you bunch of drunks are going to get this weekend. Me I'll be running in the park tomorrow morning. So if you're smart which your'e not you'll join me ok in the park running around the park tomorrow morning.
And if you see Jim in the bar tonight tell him to call me alright!!! I need to talk to him about that email!!!
OH!